Societal Expectations … by Alice ..

Revised; originally published on 8 March 2015

  • What’s ‘Normal’?
  • The Inner Tyrant
  • On Hiding
  • On Codependence
  • The Four Agreements

Dear Ones,

WHAT’S ‘NORMAL’?

You know, I’m beginning to think there’s no such thing as ‘normal.’ It’s more like, there’s the ‘expected.’ Then we have the ‘unexpected’ — in which lies all the mystery of life.

THE INNER TYRANT

Thoreau had some interesting things to say about the inner critic:

“Public opinion is a weak tyrant compared with our own private opinion.

“What a man thinks of himself, that it is which determines, or rather indicates, his fate….

“The greater part of what my neighbors call good I believe in my soul to be bad, and if I repent of anything, it is very likely to be my good behavior. What demon possessed me that I behaved so well?” (1)

ON HIDING

Image: “Baby hiding stock photo,” https://previews.123rf.com/images/zurijeta/zurijeta1001/zurijeta100100056/6161010-Baby-hiding-Stock-Photo-baby-face-funny.jpg ..

“The Black Snake,” a poem by by Mary Oliver, https://genius.com/Mary-oliver-the-black-snake-annotated speaks of hiding.

ON CODEPENDENCY

I was reading “Codependence: The Dance of Wounded Souls”, by Robert Burney, therapist. (2) From that, I gathered that the false agreements in codependent relationships would be:

  • It’s not ok to be emotionally honest
  • Feeling good about myself depends on others’ opinions of me
  • I’m not safe
  • I’m not loveable

THE FOUR AGREEMENTS

“The Four Agreements” by Don Miguel Ruiz, http://www.amazon.com/The-Four-Agreements-Practical-Personal/dp/1878424319/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1341932659&sr=8-1&keywords=Four+agreements … Per Wikipedia, CC BY-SA: “The Four Agreements are:

  1. Be impeccable with your word.
  2. Don’t take anything personally.
  3. Don’t make assumptions.
  4. Always do your best.”

In love, light and joy,
I Am of the Stars

See also “Midori: Neither Green Nor Blue,” a poem by Alice B. Clagett, http://www.2u3d.com/chalice-and-crucible/midori.htm

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FOOTNOTES

(1) from “Walden, or Life in the Woods,” by Henry David Thoreau, public domain

(2) as quoted at “What Is Co-Dependency: What Is It, How Did I Get It, and Is It Catching,” http://www.darvsmith.com/dox/codependency_book.html

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Creative Commons License
Except where otherwise noted, this work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 4.0 International License.

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societal opprobrium, societal expectations, social contracts, sanity, normality, co-dependency, four agreements, hiding, inner critic,

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